It's A Blogging Revolution.

I got a weird revelation this past weekend. Wanna hear it?

I am doing this blog thing all wrong.

I seriously think I might be. I've gone to putting up too many pictures of my kids. Who wants to look at my kids besides me? I mean really. I don't want to look at pictures of kids that belong to some mom in Minneapolis whom I will never probably meet...so why would you wanna look at mine?

So, okay, no more pictures of kids.

Except that Rocco's birthday is this week so I need to put up pictures of that. And if Remi says or does something else funny (or totally offensive) than I will need to post that. Or of course if they do anything at all that makes me think, "ya know, some Hollywood agent could see this and want to put them in the next Clint Eastwood movie." Well, then I'll need to do it then. But I promise, other than those few instances (and maybe a handful of others) I won't blog about my kids so much. Unless of course you all raise a ruckus. If you raise a ruckus I may relent and continue to post endlessly about my kids, but with much chagrin, I assure you.

Then I saw Julie/Julia and I thought, "hmmmm...maybe what the world is waiting on is for me to cook every Paula Deen recipe in the next 356 days." But then I thought longer and realized it wasn't so much the "world" per say that was waiting on me to cook Paula Dean but rather the local chapter of Weight Watchers and my dad's cardiologist. I'm sure they both would be thrilled to know that they would have my undying devotion - and money - were I to do that.

So then what?

And it came to me.

Write. What. You. Know.

Isn't that in genius? Write what you know. I could actually write about something I know a little something about. "Well, Melissa," you may be saying to yourself, "you are writing about your kids. Certainly you know about that!" But ahhhhh...you would be wrong. Anyone at El Chico's last week could plainly see that I know nothing about child rearing.

"But Melissa," you may once again be saying, "you write about the AG. You obviously know much about him." Again. You are wrong. For not only 45 minutes ago did I peeve him off so badly that he had to go for a walk in the East Texas humidity with our dogs. So see? I apparently don't know him at all, because what I think is funny he finds...well...not so funny.

If you have read my blog for any amount of time then you know I know quite alot about these seven things:

1. Hair
2. Food
3. Television Reviews
4. My oft-times argumentative and rebellious relationship with the Lord.
5. Hair
6. Irritable Bowel Syndrome (this has not been diagnosed and should just be referred to medically speaking as Really Bad Grip at Really Bad Times or RBGRBT)
7. Other people

* Dear Lord, please note that these are not in any particular order or you would most definitely be in last place. Because every time I think I know something about you I am amazed all over again that I know so very little. Oh, and yes, I meant to put "hair" down twice. For that I am truly sorry.

So, my lovelies, pray for me as I embark on this new journey...this new revelation of blogging. For I have seen the light - and it is good!

From now on when you visit Stretch Marks you won't just be seeing pictures of my kids. (Though let's be honest, you probably will). Instead you'll be delving into some of life's greatest mysteries....

- Who has good hair and where can I get it?

- Melissa, have you found a recipe that doesn't call for butter or bacon fat? And if so, lose it!

- Mel, do you think the Bachelorette is real? I DO TOO! Are you watching Glee? ME TOO!

- Have you still not graduated from Seminary even though you only have 9 hours left? Didn't the Lord ask you to do this aaggeeessss ago? Why are you disobeying?

- Surely you haven't been in a LifeWay Christian Bookstore or a Marshall's recently have you? What are you a masachist?

- And Melissa, tell us about your family; the ones that weren't imprisoned for drunk and disorderly conduct, that is.

And I'll be right here with you, to do just that. Cause I'm good like that. So tell me, what is it you want to hear about? Let's get our creative juices flowing, lovelies, help a blog girl out. Won't you? Give me a topic and believe you me I can "drone on for hours at a time about ridiculous things that no one finds funny but you!" How do I know this? Because the AG just told me those exact words!