May 25, 2011

I Know Very Few Things.

Today was a different kind of day.

I knew that it was the last day of the school year. Oh sure, I go tomorrow and watch Remi "graduate" from 4K into Kindergarten, but that doesn't count. Today was the last school day that started at 8am and ended at 3pm. So it was the last day of down time.......for me.

What to do? What to do?

And as I sat and thought about what to do on my last day of personal freedom I realized something....

Some things never change. And some things change drastically.

There really is no definitive. Some things change. Some things don't.

What changes?
The season I'm in. I've never been in this one before. Its new. Its shaky. At times its terrifying. At times its hope-filled.

What never changes?
Whom I put my hope in.

What changes?
My prayer life. Like anyone with a pulse, my prayer life goes from good to great depending on my season. Depending on my need. Depending on my urgency. I am wishy-washy. I am like the wind. I wonder if He gets as sick of me as I get of myself.

What never changes?
Who I cry out to. It has always been Him. It always will be.

What changes?
My family. They grow. They get older. My babies get bigger and The AG finds grey hairs. They drink chocolate milk and suddenly desire Coke. He used to take me to movies, now he takes me to Little League games. We grow and adjust and shift and....change.

What never changes?
My need for my "home" to be in order. I found myself on my last day of sweet freedom, dusting, vacuuming, Cloroxing the counter tops and folding the laundry. I may be a mess but my house must still feel like a home.

I picked Remi up from school today and just like every single day she says, "So mama, what do you want to talk about?" And I said, "You know what never changes Remi?" And my desire was to talk to her about God and His sweet faithfulness, but I figured it too much for a 5 year old wearing a Super Woman cape.

And sweetly she answered, "Yep. The fact that you can't put a collar on a snake."

Some things never change.

May 16, 2011

A Long Time 'Coming.

It made me sad today when I pulled up my blog.

There it sat. Untouched. Dusty. No action. No upkeep. For over two months.


My history would tell you that if I don't post for a number of weeks then I will be reappearing with a baby in tow. Yeah, I've been known to do that. Disappear. Then re-appear with a baby. Its kinda weird, but I've done it twice and it seems to pay off.

Don't get your hopes up. No baby here.

Just life. The hard kind. The keep-you-up-at-night-kind. The kind that the woman with the issue of blood must have been having when it said...

“As Jesus was on His way, the crowds almost crushed Him. And there was a woman there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years, but no one could heal her. She came up behind Him and touched the edge of His cloak, and immediately her bleeding stopped. ‘Who touched Me?’ Jesus asked. When they all denied it, Peter said, ‘Master, the people are crowding and pressing against you.’ But Jesus said, ‘Someone touched Me; I know that power has gone out from Me.’ The woman, seeing that she could not go unnoticed, came trembling and fell at His feet. In the presence of all the people, she told why she had touched Him and how she had been instantly healed. Then He said to her, ‘Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace’” (LUKE 8:43-47).

I find it interesting that nowhere does it say she walked steadily up behind Him, gently eased her way through the crowd and tapped Him on the shoulder.

Anybody can do that!

But she (much like myself) wormed her way through the crowd. Chances are she (like I feel I do on occasion) knelt down and crawled through the legs and the feet. Until she (like I am attempting) reached and grabbed hold of the edge of his clothing. And then refused to let Him go until He noticed her.

Here this, my lovelies, I'm not letting go. Not until He's done. I'll crawl on hot pavement, through legs and over limbs, I'll drive Him nuts and I'll beat down His door...but I won't leave Him alone until He has heard my plea and has answered it.

So when you all, my friends, leave me postings that say, "Where are you?" "We're worried..." "I'm praying for you..." to that I say:

Thank you. Its good to be missed. I won't stay gone that long again, okay friend? Because I've missed you, too. So let's crawl along this pavement together. Let's reach Him together, shall we? I'll pray for you. You pray for me. And I'll see you on the other side.