Aug 18, 2009

Dancing With The Former Congressional Majority Leader


Not that I care that much. I have never been a big fan of Dancing With The Stars (let the stoning!) and I have certainly never been a big fan of Tom Delay. But I am a fan of reality television - and I'll be darned if I let some producer ruin what I believe to be the greatest thing to come to television since The Real Housewives of New Jersey...oh wait, that's reality...okay, since The Bachelorette....crud....okay, since...I got nothing.

So my suggestion? If you are going to start down that slippery slope of putting politicians in reality t.v. then let's go all out, shall we?

The Bachelor: Starring none other than Bill Clinton. ("He's married," you say. "Really?" I say.)

The Bachelorette: Starring Janet Reno. Because nothing says funny like watching Janet Reno sip champagne in a hot tub.

Survivor: Dear CBS producers, please put Hillary Clinton, Newt Gingrich, Howard Dean, Allan Spektor and Jesse Jackson on a island together. Give them no food, no water and tell them they must kill to survive. My money's on the woman!

And last, but certainly, not least...

America's Next Top Model: The winner? John Edwards. Because even Tyra in her best heels can't walk a slippery slope as good as that slickster. (Oh, and who has hair that pretty?)

So there you have it. Politics come to reality television...

I had a clever closing line, but I fear I have to run now. My mom would like to point out a woman at the pool who has legs that look just like mine "if you were to lose some of that fluid and didn't have so many spider veins."

Well, that's helpful.


Katherine said...

Love this!! I would throw in Pelosi, Reid, and Al Sharpton for Survivor!!

You crack me up!

Unknown said...

janet reno in a hot tub...i don't know if i ever want to see that.

Kim said...

Moms and their lefthanded compliments...geesh.

A Musing Mother said...

(Stumbling in, standing up, brushing myself off)

Just found you. You are funny. I think we can be friends!

Ashley said...

I don't think I'd wish Newt Gingrich on my worst enemy..... Okay, maybe my worst enemy. ;)

Melissa said...

Oooh, I'm thinking Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, Neal Boortz, Bill Maher, Jon Stewart, and Steven Colbert on Big Brother. With a surprise visit from our former VP and Sarah Palin. Oooh that'd make for some interesting reality TV.....oh yeah, and maybe Alec Baldwin and his brother Stephen just to spice it up. It doesn't get more polar opposite than that.