Sep 4, 2008

Poo-Pourri

If this and this, and God forbid this, had never happened,
then I would never have needed this.



But they did.
And so I do.

And let's be honest - you do to. (There could be a pun in that, but I shall refrain.)

So this year let's make a pact: We will no longer dread being the only middle-aged woman in the Dillards stall when three 16-year olds walk in, breathe deeply, and proclaim,
"Oh my God...it smells like a stinkin' bathroom in here!"

Yes, this happened.
And it hurts.

So to all my supporters, fellow Americans, irritable bowel followers
and gastrointestinal disorder sufferers...

POO HAPPENS.

Do somethin' 'bout it.

28 comments:

Sissy said...

That is an awesome product and I need some for the school I work at. The bathroom outside my library is a one seater and it has NO VENT. So, sometimes you walk in there and the person before you, has well, you know. And it smells. And it doesn't go away because there is NO VENT. I may have to rush out and get some, just to keep the peace around here.

Givinya De Elba said...

That was an awesome post. I had to follow ALL the links you gave me, but now I'm totally in the picture.

Now about that girl in the picture on the advert for Poo-Pourri ... What the heck does she think she is DOING sitting on the cistern wearing a floppy hat and pretty much nothing else, giving herself a pedi while cracking up laughing?

The product makes you do THAT? Twisted.

Leah said...

I had never heard of this product before until a week ago I went to a Woman's Expo and there was a vendor there selling this. I can think of some bathrooms I'd like to introduce to this product for sure!

Heather W said...

Good to know and also bad to know! Funny none the less!!

Caution Flag said...

Oh, girl, I know there are far worse afflictions, but IBS is such a public, sharing affliction. I am going to order a gallon of the stuff.

Rhonda said...

Is it the ensuing cloud or the sound effects that are the worst? What you need is Poo-Pourri with a mini sound system and kick-ass speakers!

The Willmons said...

You ain't middle-aged by a long shot.

Melissa said...

Oh hunny, I so feel your pain. As a Celiac sufferer, I have had many experience with poo. If I consume gluten, you may want to vacate the premisis. I Loved the PF Changs post.
Matches are my friend. Fire. Not so much, but the smoke after the fire, can rid even the worst of dukes.

Ashley said...

OH, my! You are right - but I still hate pooing in public!

Lula! said...

I refuse to shadoobie in public. But sometimes my body refuses to cooperate with my refusal attempts. Thus, I tote Courtesy Flush with me. Everywhere. I. Go. It's the size of a bottle of eyedrops. Discreet. And it works. Until one of my children yells out, "Shooo-wee, Mommy."

Thanks, girls.

Rhea said...

Melissa, your experiences in the stall have me laughing so hard in my computer chair right now.

Does this stuff really work? You see, I don't have a gall bladder anymore and things sometimes can get a little scary if I eat something bad...

Midwest Mommy said...

I got sent a product like this to review. I didn't read the directions before and thought it was an air freshener spray...lol I had this greasy film all over my counters afterwards.

Sidney said...

That is so funny...I totally got my sister some of that stuff, cuz it doesn't matter where we are, she has to GO.

She's very regular.

Anita J. said...

You are TOO funny.

Robin said...

Sad, isn't it? I used to just laugh at my mother and all of her middle-ageness. I can't anymore, because I would pee on myself!

Stacia said...

I love the fact that you say it like it is. I followed all the links to the past posts and thought you did an awesome job making us feel like we were right there with you......minus the smell. Ha!
Keep up the awesome blogging!

Wep said...

I shall now think of you when I hear the bloodhound gang song with the lyric

"I hate poopin in public places, but we all hate that"

FUNNY stuff, but :( for you.

gritandglory.com said...

oh my cow.

that is too funny!

(linked on over from soliloquy's post)

Lanxi said...

found you on soliloquy too! You are too funny, and I look forward to reading more. Anyone who can be that funny about embarrassing moments, is definitely worth the read.

The Bayou Belles and Their Beau said...

Holy crap ... I might need this.

Petts Allowed said...

You stinkin' crack me up!!! (pun intended?!) Enjoy the rest of your trip-and see ya at KOTK! Kathi

Blissful Nikki said...

I am so getting this for my B-I-L for christmas! LOL!!!!!!

Traci said...

Ha! I think this might be the product that will show up in many of my family's Christmas stockings, lol.

Hilarious post, you are just too funny.

RR Mama said...

So funny! I just found your blog courtesy of Soliloquy. I haven't laughed this hard or long in I can't remember when. Thanks a bunch. By the way...don't you just love Texas weather? It makes for some great hair days...NOT!

Suzy said...

Oh thank heaven I am more than 6 weeks post op. I would have truly died laughing or wished I were dead from the pain of laughing a few weeks ago (and yet, I WOULD have laughed & been unable to stop even with the pain). I'm starting to see a trend. You need to avoid crowds of little girls who are wearing or hope to wear tiaras.

Michelle said...

My mother has Chrohn's and I have sent her all the links to your previous potty posts. (Misery loves company and all.) I must send her this!!! You are too funny!!

Suzy said...

Oh, and why is it that anyone is shocked when they smell #2 in a bathroom/restroom? Where were you SUPPOSED to go?

Mrs4444 said...

So, it's for real, huh? Too funny. Your post reminded me of a woman I work with who I'm pretty sure marinates in Opium before coming to school in the morning. I literally choke if I walk into the office after she's been in there. Come ON! OPIUM?! I'm nauseous just thinking of it.