Dear Lovelies, you're comin' through. Loud and clear.

I love you all who read my blog. I really do. I call you "my lovelies."
And I mean it when I say it. I'm not being mean and sarcastic - like I am a good majority of the time.

And I love that you all feel the freedom, the unadulterated freedom, to critique me at a moment's notice if you do not like what I'm dishing out.

Really I do. I'm being honest.

Sorta.

So far I've received emails regarding my frequent misspellings. Now just so you know, I do hit spellcheck people. So if the computer doesn't catch it, do you really think that I'm going to? Do you think that I think that I am smarter than a computer? I mean c'mon.

Oh, and then there's the actual, literal, phone call I received to let me know that kickin' a shout out to my good friend Kelli on her birthday was both boring and cheezy.
(By the way, I've already told Kelli about said phone call. And she was both hurt and also a little in agreement.)
I was warned that if I ever try to kick a shout out again to a friend that this person will just bypass it altogether and go somewhere else for her daily blog fix.
Apparently it's only fun to read about someones birthday if it's yours. Duly noted.

And now I have been given word that the recipe contest is getting old and overdone. Or overcooked, I suppose I should say. Well as Steve Martin said "Well exxccuuuusssseee mmmme." (And yes I know that was misspelled. It's s'posed to be.)
My fear was that if you all sent in these recipes and then I tried them at home and gave the prize to the winner that you would think I was lying and didn't really try them (which could very easily happen knowing my penchant for all things Pancho's and that I generally ask to eat out 5 to 6 times a week.) Or that you would think I just gave the prize to someone I liked and wanted to give a gift too. (Though this wouldn't be true because I genuinely like very few people and I certainly don't buy other people gifts for no reason.) So that's why the whole recipe thing has been going on since 1998. I've only got 3 more recipes left - although the Attorney General has told me he's tired of eating meat. So I'm not sure how the meatballs or the other meatloaf is going to go over.
Okay, okay, I may be cutting it short. But it's not my fault. Besides, let's be honest ladies - you're not gonna beat Carole who put in two sleeves of Ritz Crackers. It's just not gonna happen!

Okay, so you all give me your complaints. Well, here's one of mine. See that little comment button at the bottom?? Use it. How else do you know how popular you are or how much your worth is valued at if people don't leave you messages telling you on a regular basis?

You know I kid, right?

So what do you want to hear about? My hair? I can do that. My child? Oh please say "yes." Give me suggestions. Seriously. Tell me what you want to hear more of and baby, I'll deliver.

Oh, and the other complaint I received was that the stories about my mom are "boring and no one cares...besides 90% of it is made up." But that came from her - so it doesn't count.