Mar 3, 2010

What I Wouldn't Give To Be Feeding That Cheetah Right Now.

At this moment, possibly as you are reading this post, I am on a field trip.

With about 30 three year olds.

And Rocco.

We are at the zoo.

I am pushing a caveman in a stroller while he points and grunts and expects me to know what he's talking about.

And I am doing that while making sure Remi doesn't share our Coke with that kid with the constant nose bleed.

And I am doing all of that while pretending to...
a.) be good at doing "home roomy" things, and
b.) be interested in how early the other mothers got up and ran this morning.
"I got up with the runs, too!"
"Uh, no, Melissa. We said we get up and run. Not get up with the runs."
"Oh. Well, then, no. I don't do that."

So while you are sitting there at your computer, perhaps you are at your home office, or you are already at your desk at work, I would like for you to do me one favor. Pick up your stapler. Got it? Okay, now, staple your hand.

That is still not as painful as this.

10 comments:

Givinya De Elba said...

Oh Melissa! I hope you're okay! I'm guessing I'd better put my faith where my mouth is ... I'm gonna stop right now and pray that you survive the whole thing, and that you don't even have to feed any cheetahs. And that all your readers who just stapled their hands can access prompt medical care.

Oldwomaninashoe said...

Poor thing....that's why homeschooling rocks! There's never 30 kids to take on a field trip & a trip to the mall can be counted as a consumer math class when they're older.

Deb said...

field trips are never fun...so glad my kids are grown and I don't have to do that anymore....

Meredith said...

You Crack Me UP! Hoping you survive the field trip...

Wade's World said...

The stapler thing? Hilarious!!!

Katherine said...

Feed the cheetah the kid with the nosebleed first! I can feel your pain from here, LOL. Just keep chanting "It's blog fodder, it's blog fodder.." under your breath.

midwestmom3 said...

Been there. Done That. Still have to do it. Doesn't get any better.

Alison said...

I loathe the chaperoning thing and yet I always end up volunteering. It's guilt. Mommy guilt gets you every time.
Next week I get to help with picture day. On the bright side, my kid will get free pics, but I'm not sure that's a good enough reward for the torture that will ensue.

Hope you survived the zoo.

Sissy said...

Hey, that's my friend from High School, Alison, right above me! Ha. I introduced her to you, I think!

I would not like to chaperone. Ugh. But I will not staple myself either!

Crazy Sister said...

Well, at least it wasn't a bunch of mums with newborns, or you'd have to listen to a dozen detailed birth stories.

Well done surviving!