The Bachelorette: What Will We Do Next Tuesday?

Whenever I hear these words...

And so we've come

To the end of the road

And I can't let go

It's unnatural

You belong to me

I belong to you

I think of two things: My girlfriend Kasey and I sitting in our dorm room discussing whether or not I should twerp Jeff Jenkins (which...I did)

and Halle Berry's haircut in Boomerang.

Both are classic '90's memories.

But now we must officially sing that song to Jillian and The Bachelorette, for we have officially come to the end of our journey.

Well, except for tonight there is that whole "did they / didn't they stay together" thing that must be discussed on After The Final Rose. Which, by all intents and purposes, has become just as exciting as the show itself:

Did they stay together?

Were they able to successfully mature and grow as a couple when their weekends were not filled with helicopters rides, scaling the Bonaventure hotel or tables made of ice?

Were they able to make-out successfully even if there were no cameramen slinking in a corner on their regular Saturday night dates?

Ya know...the typical questions.

But in the end she chose Ed. Which goes to show you that:
a. I can pick 'em.
b. I can pick 'em.

It also goes to show you that Canadians are far less discriminatory about what their loved ones wear than we uptight Americans. To think that I ask the AG to choose swim trunks from Old Navy that cover his upper thigh leaves me both embarrassed and full of pride. Lord, forgive.

I am happy for Jillian. And I am happy for Ed. And I am not afraid to admit that I am a girl; and sometimes a girl just wants to see big diamond rings and long flowy dresses and really handsome men bend down on one knee. Call it "silly," call it "shallow," but I call it "love."

(Well, I don't so much call it "love" as I call it "really exciting reality television that imitates life - if life were spent embracing the ones we love while floating on surfboards and surrounded by pink hibiscus." Which happens.....HEL-LO!!)

But never fear, my lovelies, just like Boyz to Men, we don't have to do something as unnatural as walk to the end of the road. No! We can choose here and now, to link arms, look each other in the face and say, "NO! We are not going back to our stinkin' lives of potty training and teething tablets. No! We are not going back to unloading the dishwasher and surrendering ourselves to our husbands out of tremendous amounts of guilt and pressure. No! We are going to remain in a make-believe world of love, tough choices, hot tubs and teeny bikinis. Only this time, it won't be teeny bikinis as much as it will be swim dresses, with built in shelf-bras.

See you real soon.