Sep 30, 2008

Starving For Attention.

So this past week my cousin Meridith, who you may remember from these exhilarating posts, moved in to town. I'm excited, I will admit. Finally, after living in Tennessee for 14 years I have family that I can call on...to pick my child up from daycare when my hair appointment runs long...come over and eat cookie dough with me when the Attorney General is at one of those dadblasted NASCAR thingies...and tell me the truth when I'm trying on clothes in the Dillard's dressing room.

FINALLY!

So this week her and her brother, Brandon, have come in to town to look for apartments (I'm singing inside just a little. I cannot lie.). and so we spent all of yesterday looking for an apartment.

Here is the space where I was going to wax eloquent on our search for the perfect apartment; one that had a spacious closet, a view of the pool, nice light fixtures, a pool table in the club-house, some privacy and security, and a wall big enough to hold a 92" flat-screen.

But as I sit here beside her tonight she INSIST that I instead write about her favorite moment of the entire weekend.

Yes, you heard me right. She is moving to a new state! Looking for a new apartment! Trying out new churches! Meeting new friends! Applying for exciting jobs in exciting locations! And yet her favorite moment of the entire weekend was the moment I tried to sit down at the table at our local Mexican restaurant and missed the chair. ENTIRELY.


Today's lesson can be found in James 4:6:
God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.

I'm not above needing a good lesson every now and then. I can readily admit this. But why does God have to remind us of humility in such a humiliating way?

Sunday after church we made our way into our favorite place for cheese dip. I entered as I usually do...the AG says it looks like I am running for mayor...I wave and chat and stop and talk and shake hands and kiss babies...you know, the usual. Then I mistakenly hang my big, beautiful, 44 pound diaper bag on the back of the chair.

I have to say the next part is a bit of a blur, but suffice it to say the chair flipped over before I even knew it. And as I went to sit I ended up being stuck - VIOLENTLY - as I landed on the four metal legs of the chair.

I kid you not, I have big horrific bruises to show for it. And I would be glad to show them to you for a small fee.

The only thing that stopped me from literally ending up flat on the floor is that my chin got caught on the table.
That's what Mer said she remembers the most...just looking up and seeing just my face resting on the table. Just a head. Yep, that would be me!

It all happened so fast that all I could imagine was that this was it, "this is the moment that I have been fearing...my legs have given out on me. I have lost all control of my legs. Thanks to these thighs they have had to tote around all these years I have officially lost any ability in my legs."

Oh, no. I'm not a "glass is half empty" kind of girl at all, am I?

So there you have it. Mer's favorite part of their last five days in their new state? Me. Picking myself up off the floor of the local Mexican restaurant while members of my church body clapped.

I always was a sucker for applause.

25 comments:

Sissy said...

I start my morning off with you because you make me smile. Thanks for a good laugh this morning...I am glad you are hurt!

Sissy said...

Um, AREN'T hurt. Ooops.

Rhea said...

Darnit, next time ask them to take photos. :o) You crack me up!! I'm sorry you were humbled like that. hehe

Awesome about family moving nearby! YAY!!

Rhonda said...

Oh. My. Stars. You were accosted by a chair. In public. Surrounded by friends and family. You must feel so violated! lol

Thank you so much for starting my day with uproarious laughter!!!

That's definitely my favorite thing in the last five days too! I think I'm with Meridith. The whole stopped by your chin hitting the table and all they could see was a head resting there .... THAT was classic!

Shelley said...

You could always tell them you were performing a test of the emergency intervention system and that they failed miserably since you wound up on the floor.....let them share the humiliation a little...
Sorry that you got hurt. I hope your bruises heal quickly.

Amy said...

Right now I am laughing so hard I am crying..I know, all at your expense..how rude! My 2 year old son is saying"what mom". Im sorry that happened!

Laura Marchant said...

Ouch! /but it made me giggle :-)

Deanna said...

So now when you want to pull a prank on them all you have to say is, "This is for laughing at me when I fell at the Mexican restaurant!"

Amy said...

Okay I am laughing way out loud...That is too funny, but only because you are such a good sport about it all! Just think how excited they are to move here to experience more moments like that with you! Maybe next time it will be them falling, and you laughing....LOUDLY!

Good Giggle! Thanks!

Amy Jo

Lynda said...

You are so funny! I am so sorry that happened, but your cousin is right - it's worth posting!

Anonymous said...

That was too funny and something that could happen to me in a heartbeat! I don't suppose your middle name is Grace? I don't have a middle name but once it became revealed that I'm a complete klutz my mama wished she had named me Grace!

On the upside, besides the laughter and applause, you guys now have a memory that, years down the road, somebody can say "remember the chair incident?" and you'll all still crack up!

Anonymous said...

You are usually one of the favorite parts of my day...falling off of chairs or not. You take it all with such grace.

Karol said...

Thanks 'grace' for giving me a great laugh!! Now that being said, karma will bite me in my behind!

Heather W said...

That is too funny! I can picture it now and I am rolling. Thanks for the laugh. I needed it.

Robin said...

I wish I could say I didn't laugh, but I did. I am trying to picture your profile picture just sitting on the edge of the table at our favorite Mexican place. You know, if it's like ours, you totally messed up their system and probably didn't get waited on or served correctly, did you? LOL. Thanks for sharing your humbling experience with us.

Lisa@BlessedwithGrace said...

Okay, I am feeling little bit guilty for laughing at your expense. But, I can't help it. I lost it when you said that your chin was caught on the table. I was picturing it,and had to laugh. Bless you heart. "Oh Lord it's hard to be humble..."
Love ya girl!

Merrie said...

So sorry for your padunk-a-dunk. Not fun!

And now if only Mer could tell me how she managed to find a new job in another state! We want to relocate to TN but can't find someone to give us that opportunity. *sigh*

- another Meredith

Anonymous said...

Yikes! At least now you have family in your state who can laugh at (with) you along with the AG! :)

Hope you're recovering quickly....

annakate elizabeth davis said...

oh my gosh, i can't type this comment for the tears streaming down my face from laughing sooooo hard!! my neighbors are all starting to come out to see what the ruckus is!!!

Anonymous said...

All I can say is 'ouch' boy I hope your are ok!
Mary
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Wep said...

ROFLAMO!! Poor thing :(

happymcfamily said...

My parents house is on the market in Spring Hill if they are interested :)

Anonymous said...

Lol. I'm sorry, that's awesome.

That would be my favorite thing too. But I'm mean... so, ya know.

Putting the FUN in DysFUNctional said...

I am DYING!!!

trash said...

even my 10 yr old was laughing by the time we got to your chin holding you up!