Aug 20, 2008

Get Ready. This is Heavy Stuff.

I have . . .

1. Never seen The Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles or Pretty In Pink.

2. Never seen one single episode of What Not To Wear.

3. Finally watched Dirty Dancing. About a year ago. It was an edited for T.V., Friday night version. (Did I miss anything good and juicy?)

4. Memorized every word to Through The Fire by Kanye West

"I drink a Boost for breakfast, an Ensure for dizzurt.
Somebody ordered pancakes. I just sipped the syzzurp.
That right there could drive a sane man bizzerk.
Not to worry Mr.H 2 the the Izzo's back to wizzerk..."

and yet still cannot remember my Pin number at any given moment in my life.

5. Always wanted to learn how to dance. I mean really dance. Pop and Lock kinda stuff. (But I once took clogging when I was 15 - with my cousin Meridith - and while I could kick up some dust on the song Highway 101 Blues, it was rather embarrassing and I soon quit.)

6. Joined Weight Watchers 14 times during my life. FOURTEEN TIMES! At one point I think they hung a picture of me in their World Headquarters.

7. Decided that if I were to be on Death Row and given my last meal - it would have to be sushi. This decision has come after agonizing over this question for many years. As you can see, I have a lot going on.

8. Never seen Ghost.

9. Never seen one episode of Miami Vice, The A-Team or ALF. But do know every single word to every episode of my beloved Golden Girls.

10. Never cared a hoot about cars. If you tell me you drive a Mercedes or a Plymouth I will not know the difference until I see it. I base my opinions on cars by the pretty color that they are. Just ask the AG. I once pointed out three cars I liked...one was a Kia, one was a Tauras and one was a Jaguar. But they were all Chocolate-Syrup Brown. (Oh, and I come up with the color names myself.)

11. Never been a big fan of naming your kids of places you've been or vacationed or lived. Like Dallas, Dakota, Ireland, Paris, Carolina or Pittsburgh.

12. Recently paid $12 at the cleaners for them to sew on a button on a pair of $8 shorts.

13. No idea how to upload the message I recieved on my phone. I got it on to my computer, but now have no way of knowing how to upload an audio file into Blogger. It says it will let me - oh it says a lot of things to me. But oh sweet Blogger, you makamecrazy. It's a shame really. It would have been hailed as one of my greatest achievments. Sniff. Sniff.

These are some pretty astounding revelations, are they not? I know. It will be hard to carry on with your day.

41 comments:

Jenn said...

I'm calling Clinton & Stacy riiiiight now! {What Not To Wear}

Stacia said...

What you need is a list.
List off things you want to do and see in the next year and see where it takes you.
Your blog is great btw. I'm off to read more!

My2Gs said...

You'll have to watch pretty in pink. It's the best big 80's movie by far, and one of my all time favorites :) LOL
~ Lacie

DYSFUNCTIONAL MOM said...

I am shocked at numbers 2 and 3. Astounded, really.

justjuli said...

Oooh - Breakfast Club and Pretty in Pink.
You should have a chick flick movie night and just go to town with those two. :)

And I am SO with you on the Pop & Lock dance move envy. I can navigate my way through a dance floor just fine, but how awesome would it be to really rock the joint??

Lynda said...

You must've been really busy in the 80's - go rent! I love the Breakfast Club - a top ten fav of mine since it is nothing BUT acting - no special effects, etc...

Thanks for stopping by my blog. My daughter is adopted, too :-)

Sara L said...

What sushi as your last meal?!? No way - it's gotta be chocolate something with extra chocolate on top. That's a meal, right?

Karol said...

#5. I always wanted to learn how to dance like that too!
I really hope that you can figure out the uploaded of the message! Good luck!

Heather said...

Girl, you SO missed some juicy parts by watching the TV version of Dirty Dancing. Hello, Patrick Swayze practically naked, being seduced by Jennifer Grey...I watched that movie 216 times (so far). Can you tell I love it? "These arms of mine..."

Wow, thanks for the trip down sexy Swayze memory lane.

Hot Tub Lizzy said...

I'm kinda sad for you... no Sixteen Candles... you've never seen the smile on Jake Ryan's face when he says "Yeah, you."

My cousin and I spent hours upon hours trying to get the vcr to pause JUST at the right moment....

Rhonda said...

I love "Ghost". At my first reception job when they (stupid men in a car repair shop) asked me to make coffee or pretty much do anything for them I would imitate Whoopi and say "I ain't your damn secretary!"

I was 18.

That job didn't last very long.

Lauren W said...

Don't you worry, in my own humble opinion (though I may later be flogged for saying this) Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles and Pretty in Pink were all highly overrated.
And I've always wanted to learn how to really dance too. I just don't have the coordination.

Midwest Mommy said...

You are too funny!

Caution Flag said...

I have no problem with the gaps in your movie watching or car knowledge. It may even be healthy. Now for the sushi/last meal thing. Well...that makes me sad on lots of levels.

Colleen said...

For real. Rent ALF. You will send me presents later.

NC said...

I can not believe you never saw Dirty Dancing until a year ago!!!!!!! Seriously? I can not even count how many times I have seen it. My peeps gave me my very own copy for my birthday with added features and all. You are more than welcome to borrow it anytime but you MUST return it with only positive things to say! :)

Tabi said...

I'm with you on the car thing!! Don't care what it says it is as long as I like the color and it gets me from point A to point B!!

Anonymous said...

I can't believe I'm saying this but I have done/saw 1, 2, and 3. I have no clue who # 4 is. As to 5, I have no rhythm. Ask your mother. Now on # 6, I must disagree with you. I believe that I am the record holder for joining Weight Watchers the most times, followed closely by the late Hazel Polk of Lufkin, Texas. My last meal would NOT be sushi. I have done 8 and 9. On 10, I am with you on the car issue. Just so it's nice looking and will get me there and back home. On 11, I did consider Dallas Suzanne for Amy, but backed out. On 12, I would consider paying the cleaners to do something like that, but would probably back out on paying that much. On 13, I have no clue how all this new technology works. So I just stick with my basic cell phone.

Hope you have a great day, Melissa.

Love you,

Sharon

Melissa said...

Mel, seriously? Patrick Swayze's hind quarter is what you missed. Precious moments. Now that he is old and wrinkly it doesn't hold the same fascination as it did, but my best friend and I used to pause it during that scene and get our jollies....because that was about as dirty as we had ever seen. Jollies probably isn't the best word, but at 12 years old....what would you call it?

Pretty in pink? I can't believe it. I thought I knew you. Well, not really, but I assumed you had seen Blaine and Andee. Duckie, of course, is my favorite. Not to mention the secret cameo by the then un-famous Andrew Dice Clay (potty mouth that he is).

See if you can youtube some scenes from ALF. There is one scene in particular that cracks me up every time. ALF makes some sort of chirping sound....that's all I can remember.

Okay, I have to go check on Dakota, Georgia, and Carolina. You know I'm just playin'.....

Still waiting on the Cincinnati Chili update.....love it or hate it, I wanna know.

KO said...

Melissa, you MUST watch What Not to Wear. The hosts, stacy and clinton, are so your people in the wit and humor category.

All you've missed on the 80s flicks are a great bunch of one liners...but everyone knows them, so get to rentin'!

Do not see the airplane cut of Ghost- you will miss the pottery scene, which is, well...um...just go rent it!

With you on the car issue...

Sushi? No. Coffee drinks, ice blendeds, food from my favorite restaurants...BTW, is that how it works, you get to order from your actual favorite place?

Sherri - KaysvilleMomma said...

Oh --- You really should watch Sixteen Candles

Rhea said...

random but funny.

That would have been me paying the dry cleaners to sew on a button. I have no sewing skills at ALL. Or ironing skills. Or cleaning skills. Let's face it, I'm not the best housewife!!

wy-not said...

Oh Melissa. You took me back to the days when we fought against our daughter naming her first born "Asia" - she won in the end of course. Now, 14 years later, our beautiful Asia is well-suited to her exotic and artsy name. As to the movies, I can only say that I have suffered much ridicule in my life by insisting that Dirty Dancing is my Number One, All Time Favourite Movie Forever and Ever. But it is. Oh, it is. But you have to see it ALL! Oh yes.

Mercy Project said...

I've never seen an episode of the Simpsons or ER. Yeah. We must be living under neighboring rocks. I'm agreeing with you on the sushi thing -- especially if the fish isn't that fresh, at least you won't have to deal with the, um, "intestinal" disorders later... sorry, that's kinda dark humor... Hubby, if we have another daughter, wants to name her Kansas. Neither of us have been to Kansas. I hate the name. All our family and friends love it. Don't know that it says very much for them... :-) Hubby and I took thousands of dollars worth of dance lessons with a professional studio. We can now waltz and cha cha and swing. But we suck at "groovin' it on the dance floor." I'm kind of a nerd, and we're both too self-concious to just let lose and look silly. Because we totally WOULD look silly! Dunno what to do about the sound file -- what about uploading it as a video?? Good luck.

Vicki said...

You must watch the movies listed in #1. Although not first seeing them as a teenager, they might not mean as much now.

I've read some other bloggers who are into Golden Girls as well. Y'all are going to have to explain that one to me. :)

Maternal Mirth said...

You obviously have better things to do :)

Sarah W. said...

Oh my goodness, sushi is so my death row last meal!!! Thats a no brainer. Besides the fact that I have actually never as much as stolen something, I totally have that meal planned out. My only hang up: I dont like Diet Coke with sushi, so do I order water? Or just get crazy with it and have a Diet Coke?

One thing i cannot fathom is that you've never watched the Breakfast Club. I have never seen Grease though, so its sort of the same. Except The Breakfast Club is one of the top ten greatest movies ever.

Melissa Workman said...

You've never seen The Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles or Pretty in Pink. I would say that is "demented and sad" but you wouldn't get it 'cause you've never seen the B'fast Club. Those are like the best movies ever!!!! Girls night....my house....I'll pop the popcorn!!!

Rae said...

Ya gotta watch the first 10 minutes of a "What Not To Wear". Either it will draw you in, hook-line-and-sinker, or you will care less and be over forever.

Ya gotta try it.

Cali Homemaker said...

So very fun to read through these... Thanks for sharing!

ugagirl30 said...

Dirty dancing makes me feel embarrassed for Jennifer Gray. I mean really embarrassed.

I am not a big fan of Molly Ringwald movies, (or Patrick Swayze--he's really gross to me) but I do love Breakfast Club. And I too have never seen Ghost.

I'm white. I don't dance. Don't really know if I could, because I just don't try.

And I know someone adopting a child from China and naming her Cheyenne. Yep, that's right. Chinese Cheyenne. That might be a first. Why would you do that to your child?

Leighann said...

If it hadn't been for Miami Vice, Tom and I wouldn't have had anything to do on dates!! Sad, isn't it? (also lets you and all your fan club out there know how old we are!!)

Perksofbeingme said...

You have been tagged to list 6 un-spectacular things about yourself.

Anonymous said...

Melissa...we need to talk...I thought you were perfect, but this today???? This is just shameful. I don't know if I can be your friend. I mean, come on! Never seen The Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, Pretty In Pink, What Not To Wear, or Ghost???? I just don't know who you are anymore... If you are at all interested in preserving our relationship I HIGHLY suggest, no, INSIST, you join Netflix IMMEDIATELY and remedy this situation. Now, get to it. I'll give you until Monday...

Aubrey said...

Great Blog! I can't wait to read more but first...

Pretty in Pink is one of my absolute FAVES. So 80's!

When my friends & I would have sleepovers in jr. high, Dirty Dancing was IT! We watched that movie all the time.

My husband and I have really good friends who have named their daughters Cheyenne, Brooklyn & Aspen. No. Joke.

Tracy P. said...

Pittsburgh? Seriously?

Evi said...

Pretty In Pink was my very first 'THEATER' movie...left there thinking I was going to hell...read into that as much as you like...

Ronnica said...

#4 made me laugh.

Oh, and Ghost isn't worth it. No worries.

Kristi said...

You are so funny. Loved reading your blog. Btw, Ghost was a good movie. Patrick Swayze is totally worth watching!

Mrs4444 said...

I had a student named London who had a sister named Paris and a brother named Phoenix. I can't say anything more, due to confidentiality reasons, but can you guess what their home life was like? Shocking, isn't it?

That button thing cracked me up!!

Oh, and Ghost? A MUST see, but bring Kleenex!

Anita J. said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrSs_DiJ-ZA

Because my thrifty little heart can't bear the thought of you paying to have buttons sewn on. Don't worry about the loopy thing she does at the end. You can run the needle through the thread on the back a few times and not if you'd like.

If you need an emergency button kit, let me know. I'll pick one up when I pick up "Same Kind of Different.." at the Dollar General.