No Rulers Needed.

Please, people. Do not get out your rulers for this one. No measuring is needed.

For we are about to engage in some really shallow talk. I mean it - shallow. No depth here. If depth is what you need check out someone else's blog. I mean, I can get deep. And I do get deep. On occasion. But not today. Read on...

Topic #1: Miss America: Reality Check
Laugh if you must - but I think Miss Alaska is kind of cute. Yeah, she's getting on everyone's nerves, but for some strange reason I get her. Sure she talks without thinking, but I get her. Yes, she offends more than she pleases. But again, I get her.
But that Miss Florida?? What can I say about her? Did you see her panic at the thought of jumping in the pool? Don't you know girls like that? I do. Those girls were never my friends growing up. Never. And they still aren't. My girlfriends jump in, cannonball it all the way. Yep, even Hankins.
Miss Utah. We have to talk. A celebrity photographer is taking your picture and you just STAND there? That goes against every thing I believe as a human and as a woman. Have you never heard the phrase, "work it?"
Please keep up with this show. It's well worth it. This weeks makeovers were incredible. And I'm personally inviting you all over to watch the actual pageant at my house. Uh, wait...I got a little carried away there.

Topic #2: My quote of the day is by Dorothy Thompson. She was known as "The First Lady of American Journalism" and was well known for her conservative stance in politics. The quote is just a quote and does not mean I am voting for Hillary Clinton. But thanks KG for emailing me and asking! Laughing.

Topic #3: I am going to get my hair done today. With someone new. Which, as a woman, you know is much like a first date. Only far more important. Pray for me. I wanted my hair to be as dark as that girl on Celebrity Apprentice, but David told me (his exact words) "Babe, didn't we try that once and we decided you looked like you had been raised from the dead?" Whenever he blatantly uses the word we it really means me and I know where he's headed.

Topic #4: April doesn't email me anymore. I know she's busy. But I used to could count on her "Love ya bunches" letters once, twice, sometimes three times a day. But now? Kaput? What happened to us?? Is it because I referenced Kerri in my Miss America blog? Or because I referenced Rhonda (aka Ester)? I'll reference you. I promise. Give me time. If a blog ever comes up where I talk about the NFL or NBA or NHL or ESPN...in other words, if I ever blog about sports read it closely - you'll be in there somewhere. I've never really given a proper shout out to Hankins. But if I ever blog on people who miss church for no good reason at all she should read it closely, she'll be in there. See? Everyone will have their day. I miss you little Willett.

Topic #5: I'm on a strict diet and I'll just be honest with you. I miss chicken.

Topic #6: I think my daughter is in love with Tobey Jones. Should I be worried about this? She sings about him. A lot. I'm not sure if that is a very good family. Granted, PT references them in his message almost on a weekly basis. In fact, if I did a shot every time he referenced them I would be stone cold drunk. But still...good enough for Remi? Not sure.

Topic #7: Thanks for all the emails regarding my last blog. You all have really encouraged me. I mean it! God is soooooo good. I just adore Him. And I can't wait to see what all He has for me this year. So stay tuned. I am even trying to teach Remi to say "God is good." I wonder if Tobey Jones can say that?

Till next time.