I Wanna Come!

Here's the rule: If you want me to come to your party, don't invite me.

If you don't want me to come to your party, invite me.

See? Its as simple as that.

If I find out there's a party and I'm not invited I'm like that little green monster on that TV commercial that gets under your toenail and starts to grow. Oh, you can bet I'm comin'. Whether I was invited or not. I'm the Vince Vaughn to your wedding. Perhaps it was because I was raised with just a tad too much confidence. But I firmly feel like it is not a party unless I am there. People have tried to tell me differently lo these many years. But I refuse to believe them.

However, if you don't want me to come then all you have to do is simply extend me an invitation. You'll never see my face. Why would I want to go where I'm wanted? Besides, like everyone else in the free world, I think I am sooooo busy. I think I have soooo much going on. Truth is, I don't. I have time to come to your party. But if you invite me then I have to go to the trouble of writing it down on my calendar, finding something to wear, and God forbid, perhaps buy a gift. Its just much easier to stay home.

But if you don't invite me? I assume I'm missing something and that you probably meant to invite me and are at your party that very second wondering where I am.

So here was my offering to last nights shin-dig.

Was it my party? Nope.

Was I invited to it? Nope.

Did I show up anyway? Yep.

Was everyone glad I did? Uhhhh.....yes

Oh, and the last rule of a party crasher. Never go empty-handed. It's tacky.